This satire was very humoruos. It gave the right effect on the reader and got the point across. It was well written and funny.
Neptune said,
on March 10th, 2006 at 10:50 pm
Have you ever been neglected? Neglection is a growing phenomenon in American families. This however is a more troubling matter, when the dog gets more affection. The animals name is Zoe. It even has a middle name. It is Jean, after, ha your going to laugh, my grandmother. Now the neglection comes from both parents, but it is found that it can be manly from the mother because the father is generally at work more. What I find completely obsurd is when you need something and the dog comes first. “Mom can you come help me with this.” And the mother replies “No I am spending quality time with the dog.” The thing even has little nicknames… one is Zoe-Beans… don’t ask (I don’t even understand that one.
The neglection goes even farther it spreads through both children, if there is more than one. For example, Say that the youngest child’s birthday is in May and guess what, so is the dogs. The dog has a birthday cake sitting right next to the child’s cake. How sad is that. “Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear Stephanie (who is my sister) and Zoe, Happy Birthday to you.” Now if that is not sad, I don’t know what is. The child can’t even have her own birthday party anymore.
When the relatives come around to visit the first thing the say is “How’s Zoe?” What about, “How are your children?” OR IF the dog does not show up at a family function, everyone freaks out. “Is Zoe okay?” “Where’s Zoe.” This is madness. I don’t think anyone knows what to do. You should get out while you stile can.
Dione said,
on March 12th, 2006 at 1:06 pm
First of all neglection is not a word according to the dictionary I looked it up in. Instead of animals it should be animal’s, beacuse I assume you re only talking about one dog. I would suggest joining the two sentences where you talk about the dogs middle name and it’s origin. I wouldn’t advise starting a sentence with and, instead just use the as the first word. Your final pargraph could use a little tweaking. The last sentence confused me, what am I supposed to get out of.
Plotwise, I find it extremely humorous. I have never had the pleasure of owning a dog, or a pet of any kind, and probably never will. It seems to me that you enjoy owning your dog ang you have a lot of fun with her. Many thanks for the nice review of my satire.
Happy Writing,
Dione !!~
Dione said,
on March 12th, 2006 at 1:07 pm
First of all neglection is not a word according to the dictionary I looked it up in. Instead of animals it should be animal’s, beacuse I assume you are only talking about one dog. I would suggest joining the two sentences where you talk about the dogs middle name and it’s origin. I wouldn’t advise starting a sentence with and, instead just use the as the first word. Your final pargraph could use a little tweaking. The last sentence confused me, what am I supposed to get out of.
Plotwise, I find it extremely humorous. I have never had the pleasure of owning a dog, or a pet of any kind, and probably never will. It seems to me that you enjoy owning your dog ang you have a lot of fun with her. Many thanks for the nice review of my satire.
Happy Writing,
Dione !!~
Dione said,
on March 12th, 2006 at 1:08 pm
Oh Ficus!!~ I did the double comment thing too. My apologies. Have a wonderful day.
Neptune said,
on March 13th, 2006 at 6:36 pm
My writing is not a satire because it is more of a commentary than anything. It needs to be more believable in that people should have to read between the lines to know what I really mean.
Neptune said,
on March 15th, 2006 at 8:55 pm
When I scan through the channels on the TV I always stop at the news channels. Hopping from news station to news station, I see a lot of stories. Each is either saying one thing or the other. I love being informed going day-to-day seeing all of the views. They make me wonder about what I really want to think. You listen and wonder, then change the channel and listen and wonder some more. It is an on going cycle. Each station informs you a little more than the other. Then the next channel gives you more. You are always well informed and in the “know” of the on going topics. Every once and a while the high officials come on TV and tell you what you have been hearing and a little more. They want you to know everything that is going on in the world and the country. Every piece of information they get goes over the television waves and into your ears. It is great to know what your up against. The truth is a powerful thing and we all should know it.
Dione said,
on March 16th, 2006 at 8:14 pm
Is the point of this satire supposed to be that news stations are brain washing you. That is my guess. It seems a tad bit short to me and lacks the biting sarcasm of a true satire. Never be afraid to be mean. That’s what I always say. Think scathing indictment instead of semi-mean. Best of luck.
Happy Writings,
Dione
Neptune said,
on March 24th, 2006 at 3:15 pm
Scanning the channels on the television is a great thing. News channel after news channel is giving commentaries of recent events and Grover watches them every night. “I love to stay well educated on recent events,” says Grover.
On Count’s News Report, the top story is the recent theft of cookies from the Bakery.
“The crime was today at 2:30. There were three cookies taken. One… Two… Three… Three cookies, AH AH AH.” Grover watched in aw. “The culprit is the one and only Cookie Monster,” said Count
“Wow, I would not have seen that coming, I wonder what is going on in other news,” said Grover. Flipping through the channels, Grover came across Oscar’s New’s.
Oscar exclaimed “As you may have heard, there was a theft earlier today where some cookies were stolen. The number one suspect is Big Bird.” Grover watched in amazement “I can’t believe he would do that.”
Having his fill of the news, Grover shut the T.V. off. “I am amazed, but I feel I got the best of the news today.”
on March 8th, 2006 at 8:54 pm
http://www.satirewire.com/news/feb02/warship.shtml#top
This satire was very humoruos. It gave the right effect on the reader and got the point across. It was well written and funny.
on March 10th, 2006 at 10:50 pm
Have you ever been neglected? Neglection is a growing phenomenon in American families. This however is a more troubling matter, when the dog gets more affection. The animals name is Zoe. It even has a middle name. It is Jean, after, ha your going to laugh, my grandmother. Now the neglection comes from both parents, but it is found that it can be manly from the mother because the father is generally at work more. What I find completely obsurd is when you need something and the dog comes first. “Mom can you come help me with this.” And the mother replies “No I am spending quality time with the dog.” The thing even has little nicknames… one is Zoe-Beans… don’t ask (I don’t even understand that one.
The neglection goes even farther it spreads through both children, if there is more than one. For example, Say that the youngest child’s birthday is in May and guess what, so is the dogs. The dog has a birthday cake sitting right next to the child’s cake. How sad is that. “Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear Stephanie (who is my sister) and Zoe, Happy Birthday to you.” Now if that is not sad, I don’t know what is. The child can’t even have her own birthday party anymore.
When the relatives come around to visit the first thing the say is “How’s Zoe?” What about, “How are your children?” OR IF the dog does not show up at a family function, everyone freaks out. “Is Zoe okay?” “Where’s Zoe.” This is madness. I don’t think anyone knows what to do. You should get out while you stile can.
on March 12th, 2006 at 1:06 pm
First of all neglection is not a word according to the dictionary I looked it up in. Instead of animals it should be animal’s, beacuse I assume you re only talking about one dog. I would suggest joining the two sentences where you talk about the dogs middle name and it’s origin. I wouldn’t advise starting a sentence with and, instead just use the as the first word. Your final pargraph could use a little tweaking. The last sentence confused me, what am I supposed to get out of.
Plotwise, I find it extremely humorous. I have never had the pleasure of owning a dog, or a pet of any kind, and probably never will. It seems to me that you enjoy owning your dog ang you have a lot of fun with her. Many thanks for the nice review of my satire.
Happy Writing,
Dione !!~
on March 12th, 2006 at 1:07 pm
First of all neglection is not a word according to the dictionary I looked it up in. Instead of animals it should be animal’s, beacuse I assume you are only talking about one dog. I would suggest joining the two sentences where you talk about the dogs middle name and it’s origin. I wouldn’t advise starting a sentence with and, instead just use the as the first word. Your final pargraph could use a little tweaking. The last sentence confused me, what am I supposed to get out of.
Plotwise, I find it extremely humorous. I have never had the pleasure of owning a dog, or a pet of any kind, and probably never will. It seems to me that you enjoy owning your dog ang you have a lot of fun with her. Many thanks for the nice review of my satire.
Happy Writing,
Dione !!~
on March 12th, 2006 at 1:08 pm
Oh Ficus!!~ I did the double comment thing too. My apologies. Have a wonderful day.
on March 13th, 2006 at 6:36 pm
My writing is not a satire because it is more of a commentary than anything. It needs to be more believable in that people should have to read between the lines to know what I really mean.
on March 15th, 2006 at 8:55 pm
When I scan through the channels on the TV I always stop at the news channels. Hopping from news station to news station, I see a lot of stories. Each is either saying one thing or the other. I love being informed going day-to-day seeing all of the views. They make me wonder about what I really want to think. You listen and wonder, then change the channel and listen and wonder some more. It is an on going cycle. Each station informs you a little more than the other. Then the next channel gives you more. You are always well informed and in the “know” of the on going topics. Every once and a while the high officials come on TV and tell you what you have been hearing and a little more. They want you to know everything that is going on in the world and the country. Every piece of information they get goes over the television waves and into your ears. It is great to know what your up against. The truth is a powerful thing and we all should know it.
on March 16th, 2006 at 8:14 pm
Is the point of this satire supposed to be that news stations are brain washing you. That is my guess. It seems a tad bit short to me and lacks the biting sarcasm of a true satire. Never be afraid to be mean. That’s what I always say. Think scathing indictment instead of semi-mean. Best of luck.
Happy Writings,
Dione
on March 24th, 2006 at 3:15 pm
Scanning the channels on the television is a great thing. News channel after news channel is giving commentaries of recent events and Grover watches them every night. “I love to stay well educated on recent events,” says Grover.
On Count’s News Report, the top story is the recent theft of cookies from the Bakery.
“The crime was today at 2:30. There were three cookies taken. One… Two… Three… Three cookies, AH AH AH.” Grover watched in aw. “The culprit is the one and only Cookie Monster,” said Count
“Wow, I would not have seen that coming, I wonder what is going on in other news,” said Grover. Flipping through the channels, Grover came across Oscar’s New’s.
Oscar exclaimed “As you may have heard, there was a theft earlier today where some cookies were stolen. The number one suspect is Big Bird.” Grover watched in amazement “I can’t believe he would do that.”
Having his fill of the news, Grover shut the T.V. off. “I am amazed, but I feel I got the best of the news today.”